Right Now

Hello terribly neglected blog of mine.  It’s only been six months since I have flexed and exercised my creative muscles.  Only.  Sheesh.  Liking to dig and get to the bottom of things, and let’s be serious, looking to find something to blame my own laziness on, I think I’ve got a good one.  Certainly lacking in Vitamin D, with my skin not having soaked up any rays in months, in addition to finding myself chilled to the bone nearly day and night, I’m pretty sure my creative muse must be lying frozen somewhere in one of the deep drifts and piles of snow that abundantly cover the landscape.  Snow in SoCal?  Yeah, not so much.  I write this sitting in a coffee shop curled up next to a toasty fireplace, clothed in boots, wool socks, scarf, sweater and all.  In Minnesota.  Yes, that Minnesota.  The Minnesota that is experiencing its coldest winter in decades.  The Minnesota that is consistently shown on the weather map with the lowest temps in the nation, including Alaska.  Ha!

So, no, I did not make it to sunny SoCal like I had planned on 6 months ago.  Sometimes life doesn’t happen exactly as we plan.  In fact, I find that to be the case most often.  But life does seem to have a knack for knowing how to lead us to exactly where we need to be.  And at just the right time.  “Right time, right place,” has been a mantra of mine for a while.  And it has once again struck true.

In my quest to move to the west coast, I took a one-month temp job here while I continued to hunt for jobs in CA.  Greatly enjoying that one-month, the opportunity arose to stay on permanently.  So here I am.  It is with my own shock and awe that I can claim to have found happiness in a so-called “normal job.”  Something I hadn’t ever anticipated to return to after my hiatus in yachting.  But here I am.  And even though I still don’t believe our bodies were made to work in offices for 40 hours a week, I have to say, still to my own amazement, that I drive home every evening with a smile on my face.  Grateful for the crazy, insane day I’ve just had. 

Even though my adventures have taken me back to the arctic tundra for yet another winter, working a M-F job (who would have guessed!), I have to say, I have no regrets because I know this is exactly where I am supposed to be.  For right now at least.  And right now is all I need to know.

White Tiger

All right, that restless white tiger within has awoken and it’s time for me to roam once more.  This time, I am being led to California.  Not Northern California as I had imagined I'd choose, if I ever did move to the The Golden State.  Rather, I am feeling the need to go to Southern California.  Southern California or perhaps the lower half of the Central Coast. 

From Fresh Words Market, an independent California company!

Why exactly, I am not sure.  I haven’t ever been any further south along the coast than San Francisco.  I’ve never thought much for L.A.  At least I haven't ever pined for it like I have the Pacific Northwest.  Nevertheless, as of late, whenever I think of Southern CA, a smile comes to my lips, I feel a warmth in my chest, and a happy buzz over my third eye.  California it is.  California, here I come. 

What will I do while there?  That is yet to be determined.  I am spreading the word as we speak and I am putting my feelers out.  Since I am not currently in any particular career path, I guess my options are open.  A yoga studio, a winery, a whole food market, an alternative health and healing center.  Any and all sound lovely.  I also could fall back on the ol’ business degree too, I suppose if I needed to. 

And I can’t forget about my book.  Now that I have that completed, I will continue to work on finding an editor, agent, and publisher, so I can get my words out and about, circulating among the hearts and minds of the interested readers of this world.

I’ve been getting lots of great suggestions from friends who live/lived/or have visited the area.  Laguna Beach has been highly recommended.  And so has San Luis Obispo, hence the extension to the Central Coast.  I am leaving my options open for now.  Casting a wide net, if you will, and waiting to see what I reel in.  Yee-heee!!

Also from Fresh Words Market, LOVE them!  Such a great new find!!

Winter Hibernation

In honor of my return to the Midwest and having experienced my first full winter here in over 5 years, I thought it appropriate that I spend that time in a sort of hibernation.  Similar to the rest of the civilized (rather uncivilized, I suppose) animal kingdom up here.  Although a fresh blanket of snow still accumulates and continually covers the ground, it is the month of March, and in just a few short days it will in fact be the official beginning of spring.  Considering the time as appropriate, and beginning to feel that I am ready to awaken from my winter doldrums, I can now proclaim that I am in hibernation mode no more!

My wintery walk I took this morning.

My book that I began with such fervor last fall has been sitting collecting cyber dust as it lay untouched in my hard drive.  Two days ago, with somewhat part trepidation and part anticipation, I dusted it off and reopened my project so laden with love.  And I read.  I read it in its entirety from beginning to end.  I laughed a bit.  I shed a tear here and there.  Being transported back to both such wonderful, beautiful, and heart-breaking memories and moments.  Once completed, I found myself quite pleasantly surprised with what I read.  With what I had written. 

My only hope is that others will benefit from it as much as I did writing it.  And living it.  My only hope is that I might inspire another.  Bring them to laugh.  Offer a different way to view life and the challenges we face while living it.

My project is still no where near being finished, but I am so pleased to have awoken it from its slumber.  It too, needed the time to rest.  Time to sit, time to be still.  Time to just be before further action is taken.  And the time for action begins now.

Happy spring and happy new beginnings!!

Blessed

Blessed is a word I didn't ever use in the past.  I used to feel it was too “churchy” for me and that it was only used by the most devout religious folk.  To put it with least tact, I used to find the word itself to be somewhat annoying.  Leaving a bad taste in my mouth and in my brain.  But lately, unbeknownst to me, that "annoying" little word has somehow snuck itself into my vocabulary and I have found myself using “blessed” more and more.  Although I still use it, “luck” began to feel a little emptier.  Leaving the arrival of good things up to nothing more than mere chance.  While “blessed” began to feel like it had a sense of deservingness behind it.  In knowing that I am deserving enough of good things to come my way, and therefore, they do.  Realizing that there doesn't have to be any church-attachment to its meaning.  So now, I use the word blessed more often because in certain cases, there is no other word more appropriate.  Because I have realized I am blessed.  And I am so grateful for it.

Play time with my camera

I am so blessed to be doing what I now have the chance to do.  This past month, I have put my time and my energy into writing a book for a contest through a publishing company that has published perhaps a majority of the books I own.  I would be honored and humbled to have such an opportunity of publishing with them as well. 

I am trying to write an entire book in 3 weeks (yeah, I know), and I am not sure if I will be able to do so.  I am trying my darnedest, though.  But whether I complete my book in this time slot or not, I am excited  about it, and I love the direction it is heading.  Even though the deadline looms only 4 days from now, I credit the past 3 weeks for having jump-started my desire to both start and now to finish this book.  Whether it’s on the contest’s timeline or my own.

I also have realized how much I LOVE “being” a writer.  There is almost nothing else I would rather do than write.  Ok, fine, yes there are many other things I love to do, but as I told a co-worker on my last day of work one month ago, “I have to write.  I couldn’t live if I couldn’t write.”  As shocking and as bold as the words sounded coming from my own lips, I knew it was true.  Writing means so much to me, to my being, my heart, and my soul.  I love it.  I love it.  I love it.

So not only do I feel “blessed” for having the time and opportunity to be pursuing my dreams, but I am infinitely blessed to have such a strong support system backing me as I take this leap.  I am blessed beyond belief with gorgeous friends and family members who believe in me and encourage me to continually be my best.  Allowing me to do what  I feel I need to do, no matter how crazy and out of the norm my ideas and tactics may be.  I am so lucky to have people in my life who recognize me for who I really am.  They don’t try to change me, or make me feel bad in any way for being who I am.  They love and support me.  And appreciate me for exactly who I am.  Not for who I was a few years back, or for who I may someday become.  But appreciate me for who I am right now, today.  Big dreamer, head in the clouds, fault-filled, (and oh-so blessed) me. 

Ode to Yachting, Two

Oh my, what an amazing, thrilling ride it has been.  The past four and half years I have spent in yachting have had their fair share of ups and downs, but what I now take away from this experience is absolutely priceless.

After my first year of yachting, many people asked me if I had it out of my system yet and if I was ready to return to normal life again.  Those people didn’t understand that this wasn’t something to get out of my system.  This was, for me, a step in the right direction.  Yachting  was an integral piece of the puzzle I needed to discover the real me.  Deep down, I knew I didn’t see myself returning to “normal” ever again.  The day I decided to embark on this adventure, I was forever changed.  And there was no going back.

To start off, I would like to thank the wide world of yachting for providing me with exactly what I had hoped to find; an opportunity to travel while getting paid to do so.  Although I was excited to see the world from a vantage point that not the everyday person gets to, I actually ended up finding a whole other perspective of travel that I had not anticipated.  I learned how to see the world as my home.  I learned how to be at ease wherever I may be.  My independence and self-reliance grew in such a way that it surprised me.  I made the most of every location.  I explored.  I saw.  I lived.  I found cities and countries to fall in love with as I allowed them to become a part of me by changing the way I viewed the world and how I viewed myself, adding a new element of beauty and light to my soul.

Cheers, Yachting!

My next moment of gratitude goes to my multiple makeshift “families” I found along the way.  Whether that "family" was made up of my actual crewmates, crew house roomies, or other friends made at the many ports we frequented, I am forever grateful for the many wonderful, amazing friends I made in this short time.  All of whom contributed towards helping me grow and assisted in shaping me into the person I am today.  I thank them for their wisdom, their laughter, their cultural lessons, and their love.  I thank them for sharing a portion of their lives with me.  And now that I am moving on from yachting, I know that the friendships will only continue.  Through either their travels or mine, I have no worries that we will most certainly meet again.  Thank you, Yachting, for making my world a more beautiful place, by filling it with friendly familiar faces to greet me nearly anywhere I may go.

If that wasn’t enough, yachting gave me one more massive gift.  And for this gift, I have to thank all of those whom I butted heads with.  (That's right, I'm going there.)  Those who challenged who I was.  Those who lived by a set of rules that I did not agree with.  It is because of those people that I discovered my own strength, confidence, and insight into who I really am.  To what really matters to me.  My experiences in yachting have helped me realize the basic truths of myself and have stirred within me the strength to speak it.  And to take action upon it.   To live it.  To live my Truth and not give a flying f#@k what anyone else thinks.  That’s right.  I said it.  I am a sailor after all. ;)

I can now, officially, say that I am ready to close this chapter of my life.  And what a HUGE chapter it has been.  The gratitude I feel for having lived this adventure is indescribable.  I have loved my experience living and working aboard yachts of the rich and famous, and now I am ready to love something else.  I am now ready to love a career that is truly reflective of me.  Whatever that specifically may be and however it may morph over time.  I am ready to move forward keeping in mind the qualities from yachting that I loved, and letting go of what I didn’t.  And in the place of those things I am releasing, I will keep ample space open for a new and unforseen opportunity to enter.  Thank you, Yachting, for all the amazing gifts  you have given me and thank you for paving the way for my next adventure to begin.

Sayonara Yachting!!  It sure was good while it lasted. :)